Category Archives: Homemaking

Memoirs of a Stay at Home Mom…Imperfection

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Early mornings have never been my “thing”. So when my two boys rise before 9am my body completely goes into monster mode. After a few unnecessary bursts of anger and prayers for patience, momma is up and dragging herself into the start of her day. Im not sure how other households work first thing in the morning but I know for us, especially school days, mornings are a four letter word. First begins the arguments of breakfast, clothes, or who is making it to the hallway bathroom first. My oldest thankfully wears a uniform to school but the 3 year old gets a choice for preschool. Then its on to the babies(girls). What to dress them in, how is the weather, and whose diaper is worse?? Very rarely do we make it to school on time. Try as I do to get them all wrangled and out the door on time, it never quite works that way. Mornings as hectic as they are do gear me up for an adventurous day. Most of the time it leads to me and the girls running errands, going to check ups, cleaning, and rarely RELAXING.  Our crazy moments mostly involve the boys being home. Four children versus mommy can be a nightmare!

Oh! I forgot to mention the most vital part of my existence missing…my husband. He is stationed in Germany and has entrusted me with the house, kids, pets, and finances. OH how God has given him the trust and patience of a saint! Never could I be so trusting. Nevertheless, it is me he leaves these precious responsibilities to tend to.

You know, for years I have attempted to be the “perfect” stay at home mom. However, if you walk into my house or even pass me in the store, you will see that my aura screams chaos and whimpers of “please God please get me through just this next hour.” For some reason, I think most moms feel this way too. None of us are perfect. Those fortunate enough to have OCD to keep their houses in order should REALLY learn how to “infect” the rest of us. My biggest challenge is organization. Well and I despise cleaning with all my heart and soul! I enjoy a clean house just as much as anyone, however, I would prefer to not be the one doing it. Why am I a stay at home mom then? Well, look at the title..MOM! I have plenty other titles that fit under that besides for housekeeper. I adore playing with my children, watching them learn, and being here for EVERY developmental milestone! I like knowing just what my kids are doing and learning. Yes I would LOVE to have the patience and organization skills to homeschool. Although I don’t think God is ready for me to do that yet, well its either him or my hubby. Learning to let go of the idea of perfection is the hardest part of being a stay at home mom. It completely trumps everything else. As I sit here late in the evening/early morning, I think of the mounds of laundry still haunting me, the dishwasher that needs emptying, the floors that need vacuumed, and the endless list of things that just MUST be done in order to move up on the list of perfection.

My life will never be perfect. My home will NEVER be spotless. I have 4 children and no help! I enjoy every part of my chaos but just remember…If you are sitting at home and thinking “there has to be SOME program/book/club/etc that can transform me into a PERFECT stay at home mom” well its just not so. Enjoy being a mom and then pick up the pieces of life along the way.

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And on to Another Journey

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As I struggle with a family of 3, being pregnant, AND being a military spouse, I now am on the journey to FOUR children on top of it all! I have yet to find a “routine” for cleaning that has worked for more than a few hours. YEP thats right a mere few hours! I cannot seem to keep myself motivated! Let alone my children who I feel are a correct age to be doing age appropriate chores. So now that this journey absolutely HAS to begin I figured I would let you in on what it is I am going to try. I failed terribly at FlyLady which I never really was a fan of in the first place, although I know it has been a miracle worker for many many women. I also attempted the Home Management Binder which was more successful than anything.

Yet, here I find myself buried in clothes, dishes, and miscellaneous items. Hoping to figure something out that can keep me from the MASS weekend cleanups!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Also, since I am organizing anyways and I absolutely LOVE couponing (yes my darling husband I used it as a verb!)..I will be sharing what I find to be the best deals going on in my area and just how it is I go about saving WITHOUT spending ALL my time clipping coupons.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Hope you enjoy the new journey and the continuation of my blog.

Finally allowed to nest!

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The final nesting stage has hit and Im so excited! Now that Im out of the clear with all the preterm labor crap and scares I can clean til my little heart is content. As most of you know I moved into my new apartment in April. And by the looks of it you would swear I  just moved in a week ago which must have been the same time that random hurricane hit in PHOENIX! lol Cause it seriously looks like boxes and stuff magically landed EVERYWHERE throughout the apartment. My main goal is to get ALL the trash and unnecessary crap out of my house and into the garbage dumpsters. Then I want to wash ALL my laundry and fold and put into dressers or put into a cubby for storage. After that its going through the boxes that have taken over my room and completely taken my wonderfully large closet hostage! Then I think I will tackle the easier tasks, like going through the kids’ toys, clothes, etc. This all does not exclude the scrubbing of every inch of the house and vacuuming so much my neighbors start to complain 😉 Must get everything ready for my little princess to arrive. Im hoping thats why she has only teased me into thinking she’s coming instead of actually showing up early 😀 Im kind of hoping she’ll be fashionably late so I dont have to do this all in 3 weeks lol.

Unusual cleaning tasks I am looking forward to:

Cleaning the shower curtains

Baseboards

Ceiling fan

Doors/doorknobs

Washer/Dryer

and…Im sure I’ll think of more 😀

ABC’s of Homemaking

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I snagged this from another blogger 😀 LOVE IT!

1.Aprons – Y/N? If Y, what does your favorite look like?

Dont have one yet BUT really want a super girly one!

2.Baking – Favorite thing to bake:

Brownies!!

3.Clothesline – Y/N?

Not yet…we live in an apartment 😦

4.Donuts – Have you ever made them?

No I actually havent

5.Every day –  One homemaking thing you do every day:

Cook at least one meal.
6.Freezer – Do you have a separate deep freeze?
Not yet…BUT oh do I want one!!

7.Garbage Disposal – Y/N?
Yes thank God.

8.Handbook – What is your favorite homemaking resource?

http://www.keepingthehome.com

9.Ironing – Love it or hate it? Or hate it but love the results?

The only thing I iron is my material for sewing.

10.Junk drawer – Y/N? Where is it?

Honestly?? I have a few lol

11.Kitchen – Color and decorating scheme:

Havent quite found exactly what I want yet…I like country theme though. and like a tuscan/italian theme.

12.Love – What is your favorite part of homemaking?

My hubby coming home to a well kept home and kiddos.

13.Mop – Y/N?

Nope they collect germs.

14.Nylons – Wash by hand or in the washing machine?

In the washer.

15.Oven – Do you use the window or open the oven to check

LOL definitely open it.

16.Pizza – What do you put on yours?

Cheese and lots of meats!

17.Quiet – What do you do during the day when you get a quiet moment?

Sleep, blog, read blogs, or facebook.

18.Recipe card box – Y/N? What does it look like?

Nope most of mine are stored away in my head.

19.Style of house – What style is your house?

Umm we live in an apartment…but as far as decor…we’re slowly leaning towards a lot of browns, tans, and wood…nothing set in stone yet.

20.Tablecloths and napkins – Y/N?

In search of the perfect tablecloth and hope to soon sew my own cloth napkins.

21.Under the kitchen sink – Organized or toxic wasteland?

Organized with GREEN SAFE cleaners!

22.Vacuum – How many times per week?

As many times as I can physically handle. I love a freshly vacuumed floor.

23.Wash – How many loads of laundry do you do per week?

Right now I have to go to the laundry mat so we wear a lot of stuff we dont necessarily like until payday comes around and then load it all up and take it to wash. Right now..its about 2 big loads a paycheck.

24.X’s – Do you keep a daily list of things to do that you cross off?

Not right now, too stressful.

25.Yard – Y/N? Who does what?

We dont have one yay!

26.Zzz’s – What is your last homemaking task for the day before going to bed?

Lights are off, doors locked, appliances off,  and animals are in their “rooms” and me and kiddos are safely tucked in bed.

One Thousand Gifts

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I recently came across a wonderful page called a holy experience and the lady on there has started what she calls Gratitude Monday and a list of one thousand gifts God has given her that she is thankful for. Lately I have been down in the dumps…and stumbling upon this was nothing short of a God given sign. So here I am participating in Gratitude Monday. I havent decided if I will only post once a week or everday. But lets just start with today…

  1. My Husband
  2. My children
  3. D’s demanding will to take charge
  4. R’s energetic attitude
  5. Both of my son’s curiosity
  6. To have children that give me a reason to get out of bed every morning
  7. Money to purchase food to feed their hungry mouths
  8. all of my husbands wonderful characteristics and flaws
  9. my metabolism
  10. my internet

Would you care to read how it all got started? I encourage you to browse around on her page as well. She is truly blessed and a blessing!

holy experience

I know Im not SuperMom but…

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I want to get as close as possible I guess…I feel so much desire to change…to do MORE…Part of me reminds myself to be content with what I have, the other part says do not settle, move forward, evolve, adapt…How do I do that? How do I achieve all that I want to on my own? I read homemaking and homeschooling blogs and a lot of times they leave me feeling empty and guilty instead of inspired. I know whats in my heart. I know what NEEDS to be done with myself, my children, and my home. BUT how am I to accomplish all of that alone? With my husband gone I act as a single mother. Granted I do not have the struggle of working outside the home THANK GOD! But I do have the struggle of a 5 year old with emotional issues, a near 2 year old, and then a new baby on the way. Not to mention housework and playing mommy and daddy everyday. How does one conquer it all? And on top of this I also attend online school. Which I must say I mostly dread and honestly Im not doing well at all and questioning why Im doing it in the first place. My heart so desires to spend every day wrapped up in my children and homemaking duties. Which usually it is…well when I physically can. Right now the pregnancy is taking its toll on me and leaving my spirit beaten and bruised. Not to mention the days are nearing closer and closer to which Im supposed to send my oldest to public school. Something I swore Id never do. It doesnt feel right in any aspect. So now I have this internal conflict. Am I sending him because its what is best for everyone involved, even him? Or am I just not motivated enough and finding myself lazy and selfish and pushing my responsibility as a parent off on people I dont even know? Oh how my heart is weaping lately. All I want is the best for my children. Is that too much to ask? But how oh how do I juggle it all? How do I muster up the strength and ability to play all the roles to my children? I rarely desire time alone, I do not send my kids away, but yet…here I am feeling guilty. I do not feel like Im doing enough…yet I do not know how to muster up the “STUFF” to do want I KNOW I NEED to do for them.

When is it enough?

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Lately I had a conversation with hubby about my standards for myself and my days. I often try to take on too much or set to high of standards for myself, then I either abandon them because its such a mountain or I fail miserably. It’s very hard being a stay at home mom. Always trying to feel busy enough. Trying to make the house clean enough. Kids smart and busy enough. Why is it that we homemakers let ourselves get so overwhelmed. I find myself making to do lists for the house and projects but thats not the reason Im a homemaker now is it? No, I became a stay at home mother when we decided it was more expensive for me to work outside of the home than it was to stay home with D. About 15 months later I realized what it meant to be a homemaker. However, until recently that vision too was blurred. I envisioned my days starting before the sun rose, making my husband breakfast, sending him off to work, and then spending my days on cleaning and projects then ending with a successful healthy dinner followed by cleaning up the house AGAIN. Not in one place do I see wrapping myself up in the children. If our reason for being a stay at home mom is to give our children a happy healthy childhood then why is it we find ourselves wrapped up in our house?

When I moved into my new apartment it didnt feel like home until I scattered toys all in the living room. Then I stood there and breathed in deeply exclaiming, “Now it feels like home.” As stay at home mothers we should try to focus on what our TRUE reason is for being home. I have a feeling that almost none of us stayed home so that we could keep up on housework.  My to do list for today included going to the laundrymat to do a load of laundry and stopping by the store to pick up some jelly. However, Ive decided to stay at home and play with my little boy. Oh and throw some homework in the mix too. That is a necessity right now.

It sucks that we often get too wrapped up in to do lists and “life” that we forget to stop and admire our children. Im not saying that all stay at home moms feel this way but I’ve noticed from forums and friends that we just dont get ENOUGH done in our days. However if you ask a mother everything she went through in that day, it was probably rather exhausting. She most likely had to clean up a few messes, cared for animals(if she has any), cooked AT LEAST 3 meals, managed nap time, bath time, perhaps story time, avoided sibling fights, sat kids in time out, and somehwhere in there she managed somehow to take a moment to breathe. Most likely only done while locking herself in the bathroom to pee lol.

Mommies, try to be a little easier on yourselves. Try to focus on the kiddos and then throw something else into the mix when its only necessary or can logically be worked in without frustrating you, the kids, or making you horribly exhausted.

When is it enough? It will be ENOUGH when you make it ENOUGH.