Lately I had a conversation with hubby about my standards for myself and my days. I often try to take on too much or set to high of standards for myself, then I either abandon them because its such a mountain or I fail miserably. It’s very hard being a stay at home mom. Always trying to feel busy enough. Trying to make the house clean enough. Kids smart and busy enough. Why is it that we homemakers let ourselves get so overwhelmed. I find myself making to do lists for the house and projects but thats not the reason Im a homemaker now is it? No, I became a stay at home mother when we decided it was more expensive for me to work outside of the home than it was to stay home with D. About 15 months later I realized what it meant to be a homemaker. However, until recently that vision too was blurred. I envisioned my days starting before the sun rose, making my husband breakfast, sending him off to work, and then spending my days on cleaning and projects then ending with a successful healthy dinner followed by cleaning up the house AGAIN. Not in one place do I see wrapping myself up in the children. If our reason for being a stay at home mom is to give our children a happy healthy childhood then why is it we find ourselves wrapped up in our house?
When I moved into my new apartment it didnt feel like home until I scattered toys all in the living room. Then I stood there and breathed in deeply exclaiming, “Now it feels like home.” As stay at home mothers we should try to focus on what our TRUE reason is for being home. I have a feeling that almost none of us stayed home so that we could keep up on housework. My to do list for today included going to the laundrymat to do a load of laundry and stopping by the store to pick up some jelly. However, Ive decided to stay at home and play with my little boy. Oh and throw some homework in the mix too. That is a necessity right now.
It sucks that we often get too wrapped up in to do lists and “life” that we forget to stop and admire our children. Im not saying that all stay at home moms feel this way but I’ve noticed from forums and friends that we just dont get ENOUGH done in our days. However if you ask a mother everything she went through in that day, it was probably rather exhausting. She most likely had to clean up a few messes, cared for animals(if she has any), cooked AT LEAST 3 meals, managed nap time, bath time, perhaps story time, avoided sibling fights, sat kids in time out, and somehwhere in there she managed somehow to take a moment to breathe. Most likely only done while locking herself in the bathroom to pee lol.
Mommies, try to be a little easier on yourselves. Try to focus on the kiddos and then throw something else into the mix when its only necessary or can logically be worked in without frustrating you, the kids, or making you horribly exhausted.
When is it enough? It will be ENOUGH when you make it ENOUGH.